Anything but a Boar

Detective Oinksworth: You're late. You missed all of the good previews. Officer Mud: I thought we agreed to look discreet. Could you look any more suspicious? D.O.: This is discreet for me. Don't you think it would be more suspicious to see a pig in a movie theatre? (Audience: SHHH!!) O.M.: Fine. Let's cut to the chase. We need to get to the bottom of the case of the missing chickens. We have Farmer Fred who says he woke up this morning and all of his livestock was gone, and a neighboring farmer who had her entire extended family over for her “Chicken 3-Ways” specialty last night. To me, it’s pretty obvious what’s going on here. D.O.: Hahahah! You are such an amateur. O.M.: Says the popcorn eating pig in a trench coat. You have a better idea? D.O.: It’s all a spam...I mean, scam. Let’s do a drive by at midnight tonight to check up on Farmer Fred and his alibi. It’s important not to count our chickens before they hatch. O.M.: You’ve been watching too many cartoons.